Jack Stone McIntosh
July 26, 2017 – August 24, 2023
Two boys still need their Mom
by Jen McIntosh
I miss him so much
my heart is broken
my soul feels empty
Two boys still need their Mom
But, it used to be three.
Now, bedtime is quick
It feels too easy
No more monitors beeping
No sounds to hear
Check your watch, don’t be late
medicine, feeds, medicine, feeds
Do not wonder your gaze away
Seizure, seizure, seizure
Sleepless nights and long days
Feels like I’ve been left a stray
Our trip to Holland is over now
My tour guide has laid to rest
No tulips or windmills to see
No more epilepsy
His wheelchair has been staring at me
Where is my identity?
I miss my son
He just turned 6
He’s gone too soon
Oh hey, look, another full Moon
No seizures tonight
He’s running free, always resting peacefully
No more pain, no more SATs to track
But, these boys still need their Mom
No oxygen, suction, medication to pack
Out the door at the drop of a hat
A whole new pace
It feels too easy
But, I don’t feel whole
Jacks not here
He was the lighthouse during the storm
Our home is icy
Our hearts feels cold
Will this be our new norm?
How do you explain heaven to a four year old?
He lost his best friend
This feels like too much to bear
It’s so quiet
Will my tears ever mend?
This does not feel real
Can’t go in his room
Medical equipment in every place
No monitors beeping
No sounds to hear
Every corner, another memory
But, two boys still need their Mom
How do I break without a shatter?
What I’d give for one more hug
Beautiful blue eyes looking at me
As I bend my knee and pray
PTSD, please leave me be
Two boys still need their Mom
Please, Lord, please protect me
I miss him so much
My heart is broken
My soul feels empty
I will stay strong
I will keep my faith
Because two boys still need their mom
Written by: Jennifer McIntosh
